5 tips from Tampa Bay funeral directors on how to plan for death

Funerals are often large and unanticipated expenses that can leave families scrambling for money and plans at a time of immense grief.

Last year, the average cost of a full-service cremation in the U.S. was around $6,300, while the average burial cost was $8,300.

Experts in the “death care” industry say it’s important to have conversations with your loved ones about how they’d like to be honored, long before the day arrives. Doing so will help the people you leave behind celebrate your life without the burden of cost and uncertainty.

Here are 5 tips from Tampa Bay funeral directors to help you get started.

Don’t shy away from the topic

Talking about death with your loved ones might feel daunting, said Arin Rudd, lead funeral director of Florida Mortuary Funeral & Cremation Services in Tampa, but it can help to think of the conversation as an act of kindness to those left behind.

“If you’re going to buy a house, you plan for it. If you’re going to get married, you plan for it,” said Rudd. “This is one of those big life events where, if you don’t plan, your family is going to be left to piece together answers in the moment.”

Rudd recommends starting the conversation by asking someone if they’ve thought about how they might like to be memorialized or remembered — or offering up wishes of your own.

“If we’re guaranteed one thing, it’s that we’re going to die,” Rudd said. “Planning never made death come quicker.”

Consider your options — and a payment plan

Long gone are the limitations of a traditional burial, though it’s certainly still an option.

Today, you can have your remains turned into jewelry or remembrance stones. Maybe you’d like a green burial? Or to scatter your ashes at sea? There’s even the possibility of DNA preservation.

Most funeral homes offer free planning sessions that give people the chance to walk through options. The sessions are educational in nature, but as you get closer to deciding what you’d like, a funeral director can help you put your wishes into writing.

They can also outline the price.

Once you’ve selected your arrangements, funeral directors recommend setting up a payment plan. Doing so will help ensure your family doesn’t absorb the monetary burden after you’re gone. It also locks in the cost, which can save you money in the long run. Experts say services tend to double in price every 10 years.

“A few years ago, I did a full-service burial for a woman and the pre-arrangements were from 1989,” said Suzie Baumann, lead funeral director of Anderson-McQueen Tyrone Family Tribute Center in St. Petersburg. “She had paid less than $2,000, but at today’s price, the service would have cost well over $14,000. What a gift to give your family to not have to take that on.”

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Explore all your options

If you’re interested in donating your body to medicine, instead of going through a local funeral home, check out United Tissue Network and ScienceCare. These programs typically provide free cremation once your remains are done being used for scientific research. You can enroll online if you are 18 years or older.

Finally, if money is a concern, most Florida counties provide basic burial and cremation assistance for families living below the poverty line — though there are conditions to qualify. If you or someone you know is in need, search “burial assistance program” and the name of the county where you reside online, or call the county office.

Ask a lot of questions

What happens to your body if you die at home versus at a hospital? How do your remains get to the funeral home? What happens once they are there?

“A lot of people haven’t been through this before, and they can be intimidated by the process,” Rudd said. “It’s our job to help guide you. We’re here to answer.”

Most importantly, make sure you understand pricing. Before signing a contract, ask what expenses are included in the package — and, more importantly, ask what’s not included.

If you’re signing on to a payment plan, make sure you understand the terms. Make sure to ask what will happen if you die before your payments are complete, or if the funeral home were to change ownership.

And if you travel a lot, you might want to ask about an insurance plan that will cover the cost of returning your remains if you die while far from home.

If your loved one has already passed

While planning ahead can help alleviate the emotional and financial stress that comes when a loved one dies, only 17% of people 40 and older have pre-planned arrangements in place, according to the National Funeral Directors Association. More often than not, families are calling funeral homes after a death has occurred to make arrangements.

If you find yourself in this position, fear not. Funeral directors are there to help.

Offerings vary drastically from funeral home to funeral home — and so does the price. After a death, call around to multiple homes to find one that can meet your needs, and be honest about your budget. The cost of cremation at one home might start at $3,500, while another could start at $1,200.

“When deciding, pay attention to who is taking the time to answer your questions and offer condolences,” said Brittany Walker, funeral director at A Life Tribute Funeral Care in Largo. “Go with the person that is making you feel comfortable and cared for.”

Don’t forget your will

Funeral homes don’t handle wills or estate planning, but making sure you have a legal will is an important step you can take to reduce the stress on your loved ones after your passing.

Estate lawyers can help you lay out your plans, but it’s also possible to make a will without a lawyer, and there are online services that can help you.

Check out this guide from the National Council on Aging for instructions.